February 18, 2012
I search through the memories of my childhood looking for happy moments. While scanning through them I find there are more bad memories then good ones. Is it that we choose to remember the bad memories over the happy memories, or are we programmed that way? Does our mind store the bad memories in a [...]
November 17, 2011
I celebrate 35 years with an asterisk this month: 35 years ago I hit my false bottom. Brown-nosers are complicit in the fraud of education promulgated by schoolteachers, addiction counselors, and fellow 12 & 12 Members. It doesn’t matter to me if it’s a Grade 3 classroom, a treatment center, or an AA meeting; I [...]
October 25, 2011
I don’t let people in. I don’t like women/men. Women are bitches/Only men understand me. Men aren’t emotional enough/Only women understand me. All my friends are of the opposite sex. They just ‘get’ me better. I don’t trust… not even a little bit. I’ve written about this topic at least a hundred different ways but [...]
October 13, 2011
Yup. I’m goin there. Epic “no-no”, cause of arguments, discussions, eye brow raises and 13th step jokes. Down this slippery slope I go (pun absolutely intended). So … you wanna go for coffee after the meeting? Best recovery pick up line EVER!!! New in recovery … or even not so new. Sex can be a [...]
July 26, 2011
What you see reflects your thinking. And your thinking but reflects your choice of what you want to see. (ACIM p. 231) Today I have the freedom of choice. For so very long, I was stuck in the rut of self demoralization; the insanity of obsession, seeking and searching for peace in a bottle, a [...]
July 15, 2011
Looking behind I am filled with gratitude. Looking forward I am filled with vision. Looking upwards I am filled with strength. Looking within I discover peace. Quero Apache Prayer I’m grateful for this new, beautiful life!!! It truly takes my breath away. I’m grateful to be able to actually experience gratitude for the hell I had [...]
July 14, 2011
Love makes no comparisons. And gratitude can only be sincere if it be joined to love. We offer thanks to God our Father that in us all things will find their freedom. It will never be that some are loosed while others are still bound. For who can bargain in the name of love?” ACIM [...]
July 13, 2011
Lately I’ve gotten a couple of requests to be a sponsor. I declined both times (one because the other person lives on the other side of the country and she needs a sponsor close to home; the other because she’s a friend and we share some mutual friends, so the ability for her to be [...]
July 12, 2011
Today I have been thinking about my recovery in both fellowships (SLAA and OA). It has dawned on me that a lot of my willingness in regard to my compulsive-eating behaviours could be because there are what could be termed as rewards i.e better health and physical recovery. So part of my willingness is due [...]
July 10, 2011
So I think I got to the part where I met my first sons dad P. When I met him it was all just supposed to be casual. I could not see a future with him and just as the relationship started to fizzle I became pregnant. I wanted to have an abortion and confided [...]
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