my daily reflections…

the 7th step prayer is a prayer that i use when surrounded by the character defects and shortcomins of self. how easy it can still be for me to get swallowed up in self-pity when i am not spiritually aware. ive learned that anger is the result of not gettin my way in the present. somehow, after the anger has had its way with me self-pity decides to rear its corrodin thread and allow fear to come in, exasperatin the anger and self-pity even more. ya know i aint ridin any kinda spiritual beam or on any kinda spiritual plane when im wrapped up in these emotions and behaviors. and sometimes, the quick release from these feelins aint so quick, they linger causin depression and negatively effectin my thinkin. i have choices today. when i let these kinds of character defects and shortcomins start ownin my current reality, i have to break free from em. my sponsor once told me if i wanna get outta self, go listen to another or help someone. he said to do it til i was tired, do it even if it lasted all day. i have this to report on that solution, it works. after recitin the 7th step prayer i go out and do exactly as he suggested i do. somehow recovery works its miracle and i become useful and effective, helpin myself, and even more so, helpin another, allowin my HP to work through me. prayin for my HP to remove every single defect of character & shortcomin which stands in the way of peace of mind works, it truly does. i have to trust that He will, and does, so i dont go to fishin em back from Him causin these emotions which effect my thinkin and show in my behavior. others dont need to suffer because i cant use the faith ive learned through recovery, and i aint gotta either. with wisdom i have freedom, especially when i use prior experience and put that knowledge into action. a wise person understands this. today i get to aspire to the wisdom that allows me to live abundantly. dealin honestly with my feelins today provides wisdom for future experience. those negative emotions and behaviors get in my way of concentratin on livin fully in the present. perseverance means livin through the times of pain usin recovery solutions to prove my alcoholism is manageable and controllable. askin God to decide aint such a bad idea. 1 day @ a time...