my daily reflections…

perseverance is a spiritual principle i have to practice. procrastination or laziness cannot stand up to perseverance. in exercisin the perseverance of each of the programs 12 steps it is to my best interest to use what i have learned about myself through personal inventory and the feedback from my sponsor after the tell of it, to help me move forward and grow away from the character defects and shortcomins found out. certainly, havin cultivated a life that is in stark contrast to the life i lived before my recovery began, usin the ability to be fair-minded and tolerant of any situation or circumstance i may find myself in, is an act of dedication and tenacity that only grows my spiritual experience. recovery has taught me through willingness and brotherly love to use patience with others, and most importantly, myself. this means that i take a few minutes, more like seconds, and even milliseconds, to process what is happenin in the world around me before i go to reactin with words or behaviors/actions, that are in haste or rashness. if i dont do this, i am allowin self to override the trust and faith i have built in my HP and recovery. today it is my effort to not write checks with my big fat smart ass mouth that my ass cant cash. as this mornins readin states, the ability to be fair-minded and tolerant vanishes the instant i allow me to try to take control of others or the happenins around me without a pause to think about what the next right action is to be. i mean, what are truly my motives? to exact self-righteous punishment, or be fair-minded and tolerant? to use the spiritual awareness i have already started to refine and grow, gives me the confidence to continue to facilitate opportunities that show others, and myself, my hope that faith and integrity will continue to persevere. it has been my experience that serenity = reality = inner peace and strength. so, when i trust and believe that the changes i am goin through in my recovery are necessary and good for me, i get to use a short time of quick prayer & meditation before i commit to an answer to any given stimuli. denial of who and what i am, is a sure, quick way, to fuck myself like i used to do back in the days of doin my dirt. today i aint gotta try through every form of self-deception and experimentation, to try to prove myself an exception to the rule, therefore nonalcoholic. curbin rashness is perseverance and patience in action. 1 day @ a time...