my daily reflections…

the best way i feel i can show gratitude for what ive been given through recovery, is to live its spiritual principles. it makes no sense to me to try to keep it all for myself. behavior and thinkin like that reminds me of the ways i used to behave and think when back in the days of doin my dirt. when i made my initial amends i was able to experience, from others, how the gratitude, honesty, courage, integrity, faith, willingness, and humility affected the ones i was makin an amends to. it wasnt the, im sorry, it wasnt so much admitin that i had wronged them, it was the action and behavior i displayed after makin the amends. i showed them someone they had never met before. what ev it was they wanted me to live out as an amends, i did it. it was an honest attempt at showin em, i was wrong, and needed to do what ev i needed to make them feel righted after the wrongs i had done. it was the follow through and attempt to try to behave different after the amends that showed them the grace my HP had offered me through this thing we do. i had to give away what i had been given without tryin to be the martyr or victim. i had the live a wholesome life without continuin to make the mistakes i had done in the past which harmed others. i had to be held accountable for the consequences of my actions. these where behaviors others were not familiar with. these were actions lived through healthy thinkin. i look back on those days and see the growth ive made since those early days of my recovery. ive taken what ive learned and grown far away from the person i once was. i aint tryin to say im better than anyone, i aint tryin to say i still dont make mistakes, all im sayin is that today i use what ive learned in my recovery to become the best i can be at any given moment in time. today, my horizons grow ever wider, as i keep reachin out for more service and companionship from those around me and my HP. as i continue to feed my heart well through readin, prayer, and meditation, and exercise them by lovin, the relationships i have grow and become stronger. i get to give the love i grow away. when i fully rely on God, i realize i cant; God can; so, i ask Him to. today, i aint gotta spend my life failin, i get to learn from my mistakes and accept my limitations today. 1 day @ a time...