my daily reflections…

movin forward with the program, and havin done some real lookin at myself, i felt i had made a lot of headway. i had been practicin honesty, had felt the hope this thing we do was givin me, and had begun to use faith more readily than ever before. i began to realize, after i had been livin this new way of life, that courage to live life a lil different than i had ever done before, was within me. within me i had somehow found the ability to truly look at me and how my actions had, and still could, affect others. sharin all of this with another, my sponsor, was an action i didnt think i would have ever done if i hadnt came into this program of recovery. i knew that if i really ever let anyone in, i would have to be held accountable. all of these prior actions brought forth the feelin of humility, somethin i had never truly felt before. even though i was asked not to look ahead, i could see future action i would have to do if i wanted to continue to move forward in recovery. this forward look caused a fear to well up within me. lookin back i could see the accomplishments i had made in my recovery, the integrity that had formed within, and faith i had to lean on to get where i was. today i still use all of these attributes, sure i have made mistakes while usin em, self-will does step in, but in the end i have gained experience on how to better handle situations which used to baffle me. im still workin on puttin my life in order and i know i am not done. fear, as real as it may appear at times, is somethin that comes every day, however, i can use the tools i have learned to overcome it. willingness is an action i must use often. 1 day @ a time…