my daily reflections…

im so down with how this mornins readin talks of how the freedoms i have gained through recovery allows love to grow. i feel like if others didnt share their freedoms or love with me when i came into the rooms i wouldnt have stayed long, no matter how desperate i may have felt in my early recovery. they took the time to welcome me and let me know they had a genuine interest in me. ya know i was leery of this, because of the shit storm i had left, but as i listened and interacted with them, i could feel within that there were ones who were sincere in their attempt to get to know me. they showed how the power of freedom had helped them make the changes they needed so they could get better. they showed me how the power of their HPs had helped them move forward in their recovery, gettin to know their own character defects and shortcomins, and even more important how God had helped them learn how to deal with the fears they found about themselves. they passed onto me the 3rd tradition without even me realizin what they were doin. they helped to spark my imagination so i wouldnt stay stuck where i was emotionally, psychologically, behaviorally, and spiritually. it was such a damnin place to be and without alcohol to take that pain away, i had to try the freedom of rightful power they were tryin to guide me toward. i had to start the process of change and as scary as that was for me, i didnt want to go back to that shit storm of chaos i had so masterfully created. it had become evident to me as i listened to them that for me to fustigate the millions of reasons i could think of to go back to doin my dirt, that wouldnt ever bring about the change i was seekin. i couldnt sit still anymore, i had to start movin forward and a part of that was the beginnin of the strong reliable faith i have today. as i put into practice what i was learnin, life flowed on. i began to be carried along on that life-flow, usin the faith i was growin to become unafraid of the changes happenin within, disengagin myself from the snags along the way that hold me back and might interrupt my progress with a learned love for myself. today i understand that life is about change, whether im ready for it or not. today i understand that sobriety and recovery is the adventure of a lifetime. and it all begins the moment i asked others for help with freedom. 1 day @ a time...