my daily reflections…

action, humility, integrity, and willingness on my behalf is what the spiritual principle of step 9s justice means to me. it is where i face the ones i had harmed and offer them an amends at whatever cost to me. i need each of the concepts mentioned prior so i may use the faith and relationship i have with my HP to get the courage to admit my wrong doins and do whatever it takes that is asked of me to make shit right by the one im approachin. and by no means does this mean i do it in an attempt to blame them for the shit that happened, it is my responsibility to be held accountable, not theirs. as this mornins readin clearly states, if i want to get over my drinkin, over myself, so i may receive the further gifts recovery has to bless me with, i must continue to move forward and grow by fulfillin whatever obligation is deemed my liability. the awakenin ive already discovered and experienced will not continue if i do not honestly uphold my end of the deal. emotional, behavioral, and spiritual stability and balance will continue to elude me if i let myself get in the way, as i did back in the days of doin my dirt. i want to change, and if i truly want change, i must live it. confidence in my HPs unfailin power and love will never fail me when i call upon it in earnest. each day i seek to improve my life and in doin so, i improve the world. the amends process is a crucial element i cannot avoid. this is an opportunity for me to experience self-love so i may have a capacity to love others. it is another step in the process where i find the courage to face my shame and assert my right to grow self-esteem. i dont want to suffer anymore, i dont want or need to continue to deprive my mind, my emotions, or my intuitions of the vitally needed support i need to let loose the guilt, shame, and remorse ive carried all my life. justice is the answer and key to fulfillin the promise i made to myself to continue to heal within so i may live with sanity. 1 day @ a time...