my daily reflections…

i think that when i can give away the honest forgiveness, hope, and love the program has given me, i am gettin more in return than i could ever want or need. recovery has given me so much; a life back i had once thrown away. when i once thought that everyone should get this great gift, i would try to promote it with every breath. today, i feel like the best way for me to give what ive received is to just be a good person. surely i cant forget to offer another who may be sufferin the gift unconditionally, but ive learned through my recovery that not everybody wants what i have. i never ever want to feel like the recovery i get to live isnt worthy enough to give away and try to keep it all for myself. and i never want to try to be an evangelist, shovin recovery down anothers throat, i dont feel that kind of promotion is what will provide me with the recovery i need. what i want to do with what ive been graced with is give it away to all who may want it, whether or not i think they need it. ive learned that reformers dont necessarily benefit anybody, so why should i try to preach what ive been blessed with. givin what i have away with every thought, action, or behavior without tryina make a show of it is what i feel recovery has taught me about humility. when it comes to restitution for harms ive done to others, i must keep this in mind. ive been taught that its not my place to make me feel better at the expense of the one im tryin to help. it is my place to offer what i have without tryin to force feed what i feel has been one of the greatest gifts ive ever received in my life. i feel like by livin as spiritual life as i can, im returnin the recovery ive been gifted its best acknowledgement. as hard as times can be in my recovery, it is those times that motivate and mold me to bring out my best. i get to use these times to move forward and upward to higher levels of livin, lovin, and growth, passin on the gift of recovery without even mentionin what im doin. each mornin, as i take time to read, meditate, and pray, i deepen my connection with God. this helps me to be open to Gods guidance, findin opportunities to practice bein a lovin and compassionate person, without makin a show of it or showin my ass. i may never get what i want or make a connection with another, but at least ive used what recovery has given me to make the best life possible for myself and others. 1 day @ a time...