my daily reflections…

step 9 was an opportunity to change the face of my life. it offered me the freedom to use the integrity i started growin in step 5 and humility of step 7. it not only gives me the convenience to show how my changed perspective on my place in the world can open new doors, but it also gives me the leisure to close doors too. as my recovery has progressed ive grown emotionally and spiritually and been able to experience the benefits the promises of recovery offer. through painstakin, diligent, perseverance, the promises have shown themselves as truth. some came to me quickly, some came and left and came back, and some have taken time to experience. they have been a part of my spiritual experience; an experience i cannot foresee or even try to predict, they just happen as i live what ive learned as best as i can. my recovery has become, over the years, a recognition of the things i cannot do that my HP does. this step is most def proof of those recognitions. i couldve never humbled myself while drinkin and make any kind of amends unless i was tryna use someone to get my will accomplished. today with a new freedom and new happiness, i aint gotta regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. i get to actively show interest in my fellows by offerin an amends whether accepted or not; i was able to rely more fully on the grace of God as i gave my amends. i get to express how my whole attitude and outlook upon life has changed. as i lost the fear of people, insecurity didnt stop me from movin forward in my recovery. i was able to show how God was doin for me what i could not. as my time in recovery has grown and evolved, through success or failure, ive gotten to live a victorious life. my amends were a part of my journey i could not have ever guessed or foreseen as bein somethin fruitful, but they were. the promises throughout the big book ive been graced to live are proof to me, and others, of the love of life i now have. with a key called willingness, faith dared my soul to go beyond what my eyes and alcoholism could see and feel. 1 day @ a time...