my daily reflections…

i get to use tolerance today in conjunction with the prior steps before perseverance. actually, its more like tolerance has been a result of the prior 9 steps. when i gradually learned to tolerate myself, i began to gradually tolerate those around me. and it wasnt somethin that came overnight either, it took time for me to convalesce toward tolerance. i had to learn how to stop tryin to control resentment. when i try to control it i learned i only continue to suffer torment because of my lack of tolerance. tolerance, for me had to begin with bein liberal minded when the acts and words of others did not square with my own firm convictions. learnin how to use faith to manage my character, lookin at it squarely as i face my shortcomins, i get to use humility, to understand how integrity, combined with willingness, can teach me to love my inadequacies, so i aint gotta turn petty jealousies into resentments that cause me to nurture intolerance. its a tough sentence to write, but it is a tell of how i used the minor scrapes of life to weaponize my thoughts about others and myself. recovery taught me how to recognize what situations cause me to feel stress, so i start behavin against what i dont understand. i need to understand that i am not the only one who suffers in the world around me. just because i may not like the things that happen when i act without thinkin or dont like the way another acts differently than i think they should, doesnt mean i start growin a resentment. ive learned, and been taught through recovery, to use mindfulness to live with tolerance in mind. the weak can never forgive. forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. when i practice these simple principles, i get to turn all the shit i used to feel into love. ive learned, i aint gotta like whats happenin, i aint gotta like another, but i can use love and tolerance to live the change recovery offers to have peace of mind while im experiencin lifes ever changin developments. calm within da midst of storms says much. i get to keep a place for the spirit of my HP to dwell in. tolerance is the result of unshakable faith. patience and persistence will always win out in the long run. and i am grateful for that insight. 1 day @ a time...