my daily reflections…

i can remember thinkin i could outsmart my alcoholism by overthinkin it. if i learned what to watch fer, then not do it, i would be golden. after gettin sober and lookin back i learned that my choice of escape, no matter what it was, was cunnin, bafflin, and powerful. i could never outsmart it, or outthink it, coz my alcoholism always lied to me, makin me think i was out smartin it, and hidin the truth of my bad action while high or drunk. i learned after much trial and error there was only 1 way not to get drunk or high, just dont do it. my HP and this 12-step program helped me not to do it. i thought this many times before comin into this thing we do, tryin to outthink, or overthink, my alcoholism and failin miserably, coz i put NO action behind it. today i know that even though changin my thinkin can help to combat my alcoholism, i also need to back it up with action and behavior. many of the people i have met in recovery have been some of the most intelligent people i have ever met in life. just as the readin suggests, i too was too damn smart fer my own damn good. i fit well into that category, always tryin to outsmart, or overthink, my alcoholism instead of puttin action and right behavior before it. i also learned that as smart as i thought i was, much of my thinkin was skewed far from the reality of my situation. i understand as well today, i cant just think my way into a sober state of bein. usin the simple basic ideas of the spiritual principles this thing we do suggests, to change my way of thinkin, i must put positive reinforced action before my cognitive abilities, i then get to remain sober and in recovery. 1 day @ a time…