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Family

Every time I re-awaken to the notion that self-care is an important part of managing the three-legged healing “stool” of denial-busting, mourning and tender re-parenting I seem drawn to immediate, quick fixes. These fixes are likely a leftover of the family’s immigrant legacy of learned helplessness, victimhood, ignorance, superstition and catastrophizing. My parents on both

  I want to hold you and to hug you The mom I knew The one who came to all my recitals and who Walked up and down the aisles at every assembly To get a better picture,  a better view The mom I knew **** Where are you now, I wonder? The mom I

Loving someone who has a problem with drugs or alcohol is life changing for the entire family.  Those of us who have been down this road know that we have spent huge chunks of time and energy trying to help and/or fix our loved one.  We can become obsessive.  In fact, our loved one can

Am I enabling or helping and what is the difference? This is a question I have been asked by clients many times. It is also a question I have asked myself. We can all think of fact patterns that we would consider enabling. However, sometimes the answer is not so clear. Sometimes the answer is,

If you grew up in a family where one or more family members repeatedly violated boundaries and wasn’t held accountable for their bad behavior, you may believe there are certain people with whom you don’t have a right to establish boundaries. This is simply not true. Often, people think about boundaries as attempts to keep

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