My one and only sister tech me that she came across the obituary of our mother who died suddenly back on July 10, 1997 while I was still an active alcoholic. Back then my sister and one brther had both disowned me because of my drinking. I have stated a many times during my recovery...
im still amazed at the how and why recovery works. even after over 17 yrs. of recovery, the peace and serenity i thought i would have accomplished, still continues to expand, and cultivate new and different horizons. the initial look at the shortcomins i had, opened the door for more honest attempts to dig deeper...
People that involve themselves in romantic relationships before healing their trauma wounds, are quite literally magnets for cyclical replay of experiences that remind them of whatever abandonment or abuse they experienced that they keep running away from. The reason this cycle plays out cyclically over and over again, is the yoUniverse does not pass you...
when i came into the rooms i didnt understand that much of the shit i shouldve been doin i wasnt. my selfishness and self-centered fears had driven me to states of confusion which wouldnt let me see the true realities around me. sometimes, even today, i still feel the shame and remorse for the things...
its been my experience that when i live in cooperation with my HP, i get to experience the good He has to offer me. a change in my attitude, came after a change started happenin in my behavior. as i moved away from my self-centeredness and self-righteousness, doin the next right thing, slowly the promises...
it seemed to me that my ability to use faith and have more trust in my HP grew after the tell of my 4th step inventory to my sponsor. for sure the 2nd, and then the 3rd step, was where i familiarized myself with hope and faith, but it felt like my concept of my...
i didnt know how much fear had ruled my life before my recovery began. i never equated fear with how i felt inside. fear to me, was always put into place by scary movies or monsters. recovery taught me, then showed me, how fear touched damn near every emotion i ever had. as i wrote...
havin experienced the direction i was headed before my recovery, and experienced the direction since my recovery began, i can most def see the directional differences. i can recall not likin the person i had become in the final days of doin my dirt. i remember the feelins i felt, and place i was emotionally,...
when i am open to the direct, conscious contact, i have with my HP i get to experience how serenity isnt the absence of conflict, its an ability to cope with it. i couldnt manage the quiet times i had before my recovery began. i could take them for very short periods of time, but...
throughout my life i could always sense an inner province compellin me in one way or another. whether i followed that intuition was another story. because of my want to do as i wished, i rarely did what ev that voice within provoked because it was not what i wanted. bein as human as i...