today i am fortunate enough to have had the obsession i once had with alcohol removed. it doesnt mean that i still dont think about it, because i do, i just dont think about it like i did before my recovery began or in my early recovery. i reckon i have found the strength needed and have ceased fightin, even alcohol. where i do have trouble today is battlin my spiritual malady and self-will. sometimes it can be very difficult for me when i go to thinkin i want what i want when i think i want it bad enough. these feelins are usually very brief as i have, learned in my recovery, how to use the solutions recovery offers. my sponsor taught me early in my recovery that when i go to wantin to fulfill my obsession with self, to go be of service. this concept has helped me cultivate the spiritual need of strength and humility. it gets me out of self so i am not sittin around bein consumed by the self-centeredness i alone create. it provides me an avenue to freedom, so that i no longer have to struggle with fightin my spiritual malady. i get to look out and beyond my own selfishness. ive learned that the struggles i may suffer from today can be put to rest when i look out and beyond my own greed or negative self-worship. when i ask for my HPs strength through my own free will, He helps me in all good endeavors. it is a free gift, but i must sincerely seek it. when i cooperate with God in all good things, even in service toward others, i am led to a useful, peacefully happy, and effective life. it is a way for me to make an amends to myself for the struggles i invite myself to partake in. when i am helpful and have a forgivin spirit, i dont have to live with regret or get too entangled in my self-will. i get to deflate my ego with work toward the responsibility of my personal recovery. 1 day @ a time...
Author
bjsrer
corn fed not inbred michigan white trash...