my daily reflections…

i didnt know or truly understand what humility was before my recovery began. i didnt understand that to be a humble person i needed to take directions. i didnt know willingness was an ability to do somethin i normally wouldnt do. i didnt know honesty meant to be honest with myself. i didnt know open-mindedness meant i could accept anothers ideas, morals, or concepts for life and let them live the way they wanted. how could have i done, or been any of these, without a true understandin of the definition of each. how was i to know, bein so full of self, what spirituality could do for someone? much of this was just someone else tryin to get me to do what they wanted. my self-centeredness and self-righteousness wasnt gonna ever let that happen. recovery taught me how i could use each of these ideas, or principles, to better myself. mannn, when i came into the rooms this last time, i needed to learn how to use each; i was so beat down by my own doins. the idea of self-restraint meant i had to stop bein so selfish and learn how to stop speakin or actin hastily or rashly, i had to learn how to be fair-minded and tolerant. tolerance, understandin, fairness, and forgiveness, were character assets i needed to learn. to be able to learn and do any of this, i had to work and live recoverys definition of humility. i had to actually let loose the behavior and thought that i was the only one who could help me or do what was needed to overcome my alcoholism. it meant shuttin my big fat mouth and not just hearin another, but listenin to em with intent. havin reaped what id sewn for so long, it was a true practice of each of the ideas ive mentioned this mornin to get what i have today. humility has given me a capacity to live with the help of my HP and instruction from others. as i remember to practice lettin my HP direct my actions, in time, its become a healthy habit, one of the healthiest habits ive ever developed. with the actions learned through recovery, ive gotten to grow in the heart of true sobriety and experience what i give to others today in return. 1 day @ a time...