my daily reflections…

how am i to use what ive learned from my early recovery to live today so i aint gotta go through such drastic inventories anymore. to heal myself so others didnt have to suffer from my personality, behavior, or thinkin problems, took time. but it was the start, and perseverance to continue to follow through, that has made the difference. i think back and am grateful and thankful that God provided me a place to get a start of the cognitive behavioral healin i needed. i dont know if i could have done it livin in an apartment on my own, without the structure of the halfway house i was stayin at offered. if i was to learn all of this shit and then do nothin about it, i reckon i wouldntve remained sober and in recovery today. as the days, weeks, months, and years, have passed since my initial journey through the 12 steps, i been able to continue to grow within so i dont use those character defects and shortcomins to harm others. the 4th, 5th, and 8th steps were essential in givin me the knowledge of the experiences i went through so i could gain the wisdom to sense when i feel myself begin to slip. i know my alcoholism is still alive and well within, but what i do with what ive learned is keep pickin myself up and makin a fresh start each day. difficulties come, its what i do when they come that tells the story of my recovery. im still sober today because of the use of what ive learned about myself. without a positive behavioral change in ambition today, i couldnt have made the decision to decide what i wanted from life. it was with clarity of mind and one act of desperation so long ago, i get to have the life i do today. i aint gotta be the arrogant person who would climb the ladder to any success by standin on and crushin the lives of others. ive learned how to quietly listen to another, instead of tryin to overshadow them with words or actions that make them feel less than they are. as ive grown slowly, the circumstances ive lived through have made me willin to believe my HP can heal me. my HP has restored me to a right peace of mind. i get to live with emotional freedom today. 1 day @ a time...