my daily reflections…

all of these mentioned in this mornins daily became a part of bein joel. i would always tell myself i could continue to drink if i just didnt do the stupid shit i did when i was partyin. well, you know, that never happened, i always fucked it up. the result would be the things listed in this mornins readin. it was easy to live that way fer a while, but those feelins are strong, and they continued to grow until i had no other choice but to get help. today i still may deal with these troubles a little, but i have a different solution to em. with help from my HP, sponsor, and our fellowship, i am able to live through tough times. all of these things mentioned above can still be a part of my life even with years in recovery. these are times i have let my self-will take over in my life. i have stopped relyin on my HP and took control over everythin in my life. when i realize this has happened it is my responsibility to use the tools of recovery to change these happenins. these spiritual principles i have been taught, and have studied, do not stop workin if i work em, live em, and practice em in my life. it is when i fail to utilize em, i fail to reap the benefits of em. this is not an overnight process fer me, i must continue to do em daily fer the rest of my life or suffer the consequences listed in the readin. 1 day @ a time…