In 4 days I will be clean and sober for 9 months. I never thought I could get a day sober much less this long. And it is absolutely mind blowing to me how much my life has changed. I am doing things I never imagined I would do in my life, especially after losing
“My name is Damien, and I’m an alcoholic.” This is the conventional way to introduce oneself at a meeting of the fellowship. It bugs me. The very first time I said these words they were incredibly powerful and liberating — when I finally said them, my surrender was complete. But as my sober time increases,
Happy New Year! A changing of the calendar page, turning over a new leaf, the hope of a new beginning. There is hope but there is also the illusion of imagining that a future day could mean more than the embrace of the present in a new or more faithful fashion. I am a rebel.
I learn so much from people at meetings. A month or so ago we were talking about intentions, and a woman said she “found the results of her intentions in her crisper bin.” We all burst out laughing, because we all know that drawer in the fridge—the one with exotic vegetables: celery root, kale, mustard
The illusion of uncertainty masks the depravity of the fear I feel locked in the void of not knowing but not wanting to stop either Looking out at the endless rain and mucky landscape there is always something else to ponder aways a sense of not being there yet And not knowing where the hell
Last night I sat in a circle with 124 other women. The questions were asked. What are you done with? What are you ready to scrub off yourself? What have you processed and cooked and beat to death this year? What are you ready to throw on the compost pile. I stress the word compost
With the ever increasing demands on us to function in our high pressure world, many of us find we live in a constant state of high alert and anxiety. I myself, spent over a decade in sustained high stress situations and having to deal with the reality of my shattered life in recovery, without anything
Good stress, bad stress – distress finds redress. The word stress comes up over and over again at this time of the year as the seasons change from Gratitude (Thanksgiving) to Shopping (Christmas.) We move from being grateful for all we have to the sales and promotion influences of needing more. This can cause pressure.
When we become abstinent from our drug or behavior of choice, a world of opportunity for healing the mind body and spirit opens up to us. Many of us find that the reality of our lives without our addiction to lean on is highly stressful. The nutritional needs are higher than average when we are
