recovery has taught me how anger affects me. it reaches deep within me to force me to react to it in unhealthy emotional, psychological, behavioral, and spiritual ways. it digs into some of the character flaws and shortcomins which can have me processin it in regard to self-centered fear, resentment, self-esteem, security, ambitions, and personal...
keepin resentment only keeps me stuck in my alcoholism. it keeps me blocked from the good my HP has in store for me. it dont mean i cant feel emotions, be sad, or feel hurt, im posed to feel those emotions. they are what help me seek out new ways to live and grow healthy...
how can i live with the “number one” offender of my character, my ego, and false sense of pride? why did i, for so long, allow my thinkin to dictate my behavior because of perceived slights to me? the delusion i suffered from became so exhaustin my only recourse, without a positive solution to live...
i cannot tell ya’ll that i still dont suffer from self-pity from time to time. i reckon ya’ll know im human, God made me so i could feel all or any of the emotions any human feels. self-pity is most def an emotion that still strikes even as im well into my recovery and have...
are ya fuckin kiddin me? i gotta give up the way i think, the way i behave, the way i live, the very shit that helped me survive so, ehem, elegantly throughout my life? these are the thoughts i had before i came into the rooms. they were even maintained for a short time into...
it was easy to deflect personal responsibility back in the days of doin my dirt while ridin da ol blame train. 1st class tickets were readily available. how easy it still may be to jump aboard, lookin at the ones who perceivably wrong me so i aint gotta look at myself. recovery has taught me,...
emotional, psychological, behavioral, and spiritual growth are each areas in my life i needed to cultivate when i came into recovery. the development of each was necessary because i had stunted each through my alcoholism. these areas are also permanent parts of my character i cannot ever let loose of or get rid of. they...
i remember what it was like to be held captive by the obsession i had for the next drink. eventually i would succumb to the mania and get that 1st drink again. then the fuckin cravins would start. the mental preoccupation and infatuation would lead me to the compulsion to take the 2nd drink. i...
step 4s personal inventory was an attention-grabbin review into who and what i had become throughout my alcoholism. it was a stern, essential, and illuminatin stare into learnin how to turn a consciousness of what others had said & done to me, into a consciousness of what made me say & do the things i...
ive been able to learn the difference between gratitude and thankfulness in my recovery. its my understandin that gratitude is an action, thankfulness is an emotion. gratitude means that i show another the thankfulness im feelin within; it is a quality of bein thankful, a readiness to show appreciation for, and to return, kindness. it...