i cannot tell ya that at all times im inspired to do well or the best i can. currently ive made the decision to make a move geographically that is far away from any comfort zone ive ever known. the only thing that ive found here, 850 miles away, that i could call anythin that...
i reckon when i made my final steps into the rooms, i had begun the process of humility. as i sat in the rooms, i listened to what others had to say. even as i was full of anger, self-pity, and resentment, i needed to listen and try to utilize what i was hearin to...
My beautiful creation GOOD MORNING!!!!!!! I give you this beautiful day!!!!! It's a miracle we are together on this earth today. Hay cosas dificiles y faciles, hoy enfocate en las faciles. Fog is like difficulties, look past them towards te easy. Be grateful for the easy things and beauty. Play and enjoy. Focus on play....
So, fourteen days after the relapse. It's been kind of a high being sober these past few weeks. Today, I woke up in a great mood. Then something happened. I had my coffee, did yoga (which is fabulous) read, prayed (maybe not earnestly enough?) and began my day. As the morning continued I kept feeling...
for me, i have to use a Higher Power. alcohol filled such a vacuum in my soul, it worked for a very long time. when i took it away i needed somethin to replace it. self-will can suffice me for a short time. i can do anythin if i can endure the pain long enough....
i remember the knot i had tied myself up in when i first came into the rooms. i reckon the reason i can recall it vividly is because i can still tie myself up like that, though nearly not as bad, but i can tell when ive let go and let joel. it took some...
It's funny sometimes how our minds just can grind away at things. Round and round, like a rock tumbler polishing quartz. I'm an introvert and as an introvert, I tend to digest conversations for months in the back of my mind. I don't know if this is healthy or not. I have not taken time...
today i understand that i had never had much control over the events of my life. i sure as fuck thought i did, but when i honestly look at my past, i can see i had none. self-will had always placed people, places, and things as control items for me to follow without me even...
10 Months ago, I had entered a 30 day treatment center in Colorado. After 30 years of ups and downs with alcohol. I had spent 13 years sober in my life, relapse sent me reeling into another 9 years of moderate to heavy drinking, short burst of sobriety, then it would get worse. The Merry...
Ah the loneliness does wind up catching us all. During our time out in the wild drinking in the dark alone, hiding because we are ashamed. Then the loss of friends and love ones follows. Then during recovery they come and go like fall leaves drifting in the wind. Add in a relapse and it...